


Crying One Hundred Times

by HayasakaSan



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: //sadistanabaako, Aer - Freeform, And yeah gets all confused who's iwa, Idek how to tag tbh, Kags makes a cameo at some point, M/M, Novelist Iwa is thur, Oikawa being such a nerd i neeed it in my lyfe, Oikawa having amnesia, Temporary amnesia tbh, ahue, and Artist Oikawa too hueheuheu, and apparently Iwa has this cancer, and he dies, what is this, yeap im so sorry but it happened
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-05-28
Packaged: 2018-04-01 15:50:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4025758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HayasakaSan/pseuds/HayasakaSan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I-I was afraid that you won’t have to...”</p><p>Iwaizumi’s eyes narrowed at the sight of him being immersed in his thoughts, being so deep in those sworn unruly whispers of any much more possible dictations this would lead to.</p><p>(“Let’s meet again when I get better, okay?”<br/>“But Iwa-chan! I wanna go out and take care of you!”)</p><p>“An-And I thought for our future, your future Iwa-chan-”</p><p>He wanted to tell him he loved him. Loved him no matter what would happen, hold onto him if he had to; cling on his arms for warmth as he begged him to go back. As if everything that was happening was too wrong and he wanted to be back where everything was alright.</p><p>“I don’t give a damn on my future or anyone’s future, Shittykawa Hell with it!”</p><p>(“It seem like it’s going to rain again, Huh?”<br/>“I wanna see the lunar rainbow, Iwa-chan!”<br/>“After I get better, you idiot”)</p><p>((Or: In which Iwaizumi gets this cancer and Oikawa has this temporary amnesia and breaks down when he realizes he’s missing out on Iwa-chan for four years))</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crying One Hundred Times

**Author's Note:**

> Guess what I have descended to the angst thing what is this 
> 
> Basically a kinda tragic IwaOi fic (imnotsorry);;;;  
> Btw I particularly gave some names for Iwa-chan’s parents so ;;;;; //sweats Hasuo’s his father’s name and Aiko’s his mom-  
> Oh just so you know the plot (the amnesia thing and cancer so) and some of the scenes (well probably most of the scenes) were based on a Japanese movie named “Crying 100 Times; Every Raindrop Falls” By Ryuichi Hiroki (It crossed over one of the channels on the TV I just had that moment).  
> I hope you’d find yourself enjoying this one, loves! Ò 7 Ó)////////

One thing Oikawa had wondering about ever since he was grade school was those fascinating multicoloured arcs of the sky showing up at the dark midnight sky, glowing as the rainbow shifts to a lot more specific beauty around as he imagines running his fingers to those bands of colours.

 

His mother had once told him at a young age of four, all smiles as she flattened out Tooru’s small crumpled t-shirt; _You have to wait until midnight dear after it rains_ , Had been urging to put on those comfortable shorts to prepare him a play date for his best friend Hajime. _Then you have to go to a high hill to see it much clearly honey_. He had been so oblivious on such beauty in the world that made him go around tempted to try out to look for, it had actually been made as a habit for him; his mother didn’t really mind though, _just after you finish your homework_ , she adds, laughing at how he was consistent to go.

 

But he was still so much interested showing off these stories of stars and constellations he had discovered as he brags about it to Iwaizumi, who was practically too engrossed to the children’s book his mother had bought him as a reward for having a good grade in English.

 

It was far more odd, to be frank; how did he even became his best friend anyway?

 

They have met at least in a youthful age of five, constantly beginning off at the wrong hand to their first impressions. For the first time he had seen Iwaizumi, Oikawa had cried as he clung to his mother’s skirt, due to the boy accidentally hitting him with volleyball. Their mothers ended up just as if they were childhood friends (the fact that Oikawa’s family had arrived next to Iwaizumi’s and at some point they have the same age of their little boys), coping with each other’s conversations in some sort of way.

 

There were times Oikawa had been hesitant to even look at the other ever so properly, nevertheless even purposely notice him (if he had glanced up to the boy he’d just stick out his tongue to him and ran back home to his mom). At some point their mothers arranged them to a play date, rooting them on to even get know with each other. It started off by pushing and kicking each other (mostly Iwaizumi does that,), mimicking sword fighting by using mere sticks at their backyard (Oikawa had cried when he lost at their first fight, despite he was the one who started it,), at that point they ended up laughing rather crying at their own actions.

 

It was so precious, there was one time Iwaizumi had cried once Tooru had called him fat and ugly (due to those funny big jackets his mother had given him), making him ignore the latter for a whole week before Tooru had come clawing at his room’s door, crying to be forgiven for what he has told. And even gave him this pink plastic ring at the backyard at once they finished playing infront of their mothers, making them laugh so hard they couldn’t resist taking a picture for memories. Oikawa would still remember his Iwa-chan’s face just taking him infront of their mothers and _Oh whaaaat did he just knelt down and took my hand_ , Iwaizumi thought as he flushed in deep scarlet red, taking retrieving his hand back once Tooru had slipped the butterfly shaped ring (yup how romantic) to his small fingers and yelled at him.

 

Oikawa raised his head as he felt the moonlight rays shine much more brightly than a few hours ago. His lips curled up into a grin once he had seen those bright multicoloured sight had formed in an arching way below the moon. He once lifted his camera up and with one flash he had finally, in all these years for searching, taken a picture of this beauty on his own.

 

A rushing feeling of confidence had run through the chocolate haired young man, as he released a comforting sigh from his lips.

 

So this is what it feels like to remember again.

 

* * *

 

 

 

It had been practically four years.

 

Four, long years of having a complicated amnesia and having not much memories from his past experience.

 

He had himself a job he began having a liking; being an own artist. Being free to let all his imagines go loose as he holds up at any type of art material on his calloused fingers. It had made him so fascinated of his own works, making sure every canvass was utmost beautiful in his own original way.

 

Oikawa’s eyes softened as he took some steps back to see his recent work; a simple yet graceful curve of the midnight sky. Gentle, soft-able tufts stuck out on the edges, at how the stars he had painted glimmer, as if it was so... Realistic.

 

What more he had find so interesting to imagine was the whole night sky, seeing how it contrasts with the shimmering stars along with radiant moon. He felt _full_ , something had filled up inside him with much inspiration to continue on to his _dream_ , to be an artist and show off his own creative designs one day. And maybe just one day, he’d have his own gallery-

 

(“What’re you drawing?”

 

“It’s Iwa-chan and me!”

 

“You look like an alien though.”

 

“Mean Iwa-chan! Mean!”)

 

At some point he would think what had just come into his mind, and just because he had never understood the fact that he is still not remembering everything, never had succeeded until now why this had happened to him. Everything made him think what was even the reason it had gone down to something like this; much more he wanted to resolve any type of questions he had asked to himself, waiting for an explanation and haven’t received anything nevertheless.

 

Oikawa had accepted for the past four years that he hadn’t actually have the chance to have the significance to familiarize some faces that had wiped out on his face. At that point he had his familiar wave over concern at his current situation, desperate if there was anything, anything might’ve made him to remember some of his memories, but yet it has to go downhill from here (ayy puso).

 

That day before he had left for his first check up for his accident, particularly some unknown man to him had approach to him and gave him affection for a hug and these familiar soothing whispers had made him fuzzy. Confusion was running through him as he had pushed him away from the other’s tight grip, making this other man look at him as if he was some stranger.

 

Which, he is to Oikawa’s point of view.

 

He had never bother to answer the others questions as his own filled him up, he had instead complimented the weather and bowed, leaving the shorter confused as he left to meet up with his own parents for a drive home.

 

There were some people had asked him if he was still together with this Hajime, _what was his name again_? Asking if maybe he had remembered that person. He had told maybe he had met this _Hajime_ , yet instead of being asked much further questions they had stop with their small interrogations, making the other much more confused at what this _Hajime_ made him involved.

 

He had learned that this person was _Iwaizumi Hajime_ up for a fact. He was told he was this friend of this since childhood (he should’ve remembered but he didn’t), playing volleyball (who knew he actually liked volleyball in the first place) and much more. There was some hesitation from his friends and people who had known Iwaizumi who was this person to _him_ , but with a reply with the same thing over and over again.

 

He wanted more answers yet he hadn’t received any of them at all (even searching him online his skills wasn’t a great measure to this thing), soon he had continued on his current work and made him wondering what was behind the story of this _Iwaizumi Hajime_.

 

Another thing of his other part-time jobs was being some normal employee at a café, serving up customers too their own orders with a smile on his face to make sure he had at least entertained them in his little time. It had graduated from a newbie for some popular model-like idol for the high-school girls around, swooning over his mini show of walking briskly through the walls, making them squeal in delight after giving them his own signature smile and peace sign.

 

“Oikawa,” Hanamaki had called him over the counter, giving him a hand gesture (which Oikawa never really did have the mind to understand). “An order from table nine,”

 

Giving the other a non-committing hum Oikawa stood up as he briskly walked to the counter, and brought the tray up and off he left to the assigned table he was ought to serve. “Hello! Here’s your order-”

 

He could hear himself _screeching_ inside as the brunette stood infront of the seated young man infront of him.

 

His eyes flickering to look up at the person infront of him, Tobio had nothing much on his expression but as a raise of an eyebrow, giving off an unemotional response. The raven haired lad nodded nonetheless, gesturing Tooru to sit down. “I hope you don’t mind, I really want to talk to you,” He had said in his own monotone voice (pfft really), placing himself down on his own seat as soon as the other had sat down.

 

“I’m not here to be best of friends-

 

 _“Eh, but I wanted to pummel you right now”_ He swore he heard Kageyama mumble much of that response.

 

-Tobio-chan,” Oikawa puffed out his cheeks in a gaud manner, flushing over to his right. “What brings you here anyway?” His smile – that fake, _fake_ smile –twitched at the Kageyama’s calm demeanor.

 

From the other side, Kageyama lowered his gaze from Oikawa to his cup of coffee. “How are you,” He started, receiving a pointed look from the other. He then furrowed his brows. Despite he wanted to strangle this guy in some sort of way possible, he refrained himself from doing so and continued, “Have you, -how do I put this,- been okay these years?"

 

“That’s an odd thing coming from you, Tobio-chan,” Oikawa’s voice was hinted with confusing, as he cocked his head to the side, showing off his confused face to the raven haired lad. “I’m okay, I guess...” He muttered, his fingers twitching at the cold feeling of the polished table.

 

“Do you, remember on things some sort?” Kageyama replied.

 

 _Ah, this again_ , Oikawa thought. _About this amnesia thing._

 

“I guess not?” He lied. “Hah, I guess I have no luck at all, haha,” Oikawa lets out a strained laugh, causing Kageyama to cringe at the broken sound. “... Is this about the Izumo-

 

_“Iwaizumi, dumbass.” “yeah yeah”_

 

-person again?” he asked, resting his chin on the back of his palmed. He smiled at the sight of Kageyama to huff slightly, teasing him at the way he denies on things like this.

 

But before Oikawa had any more nerve to banter one more teasing sentence Tobio had cut him off with a response;

 

_“It’s been four years, Oikawa-san.”_

 

* * *

( _“One mere sketchbook was displayed on his study table; all of these sketches were all windswept with erasures. Some messy edges were still visible, Iwaizumi would remark at that scene. He reached down to the chair near him and sat down to examine the draft._

_A simple yet so extraordinary in his eyes. There was a king on his feet, drawing himself near to the lake as he held on a dagger in his hands, as if there was a message to this simple draft. Passion began to rile up inside of him once he held a pen in his grasp._

_“I, too, dislike it; there are things that all beyond important than all riches –_

_Reading this story in an imaginative way, with a perfect condemns feeling for it;_

_You had slept on soft, last breaths, out of stillness in your palace walls_

_No genuine to anything –_

_Whether they have lived or died.”_

_‘Surely Oikawa wouldn’t mind me putting on notes would he...’ He mused, and began writing on another clean patch of space under the sketchbook;”_

_“If I have to die a million deaths to meet you from the other side; I will do it; because I love you.”)_

 

* * *

 

Oikawa wondered in his mind; ‘Who was I? Before all this-’ He had thought in this hurried way to know. Everything was simply like a blatant lie to him. Utmost as if everyone was lying about what was wrong and what was right to this point.

 

* * *

 

_“Makki, it’s been four years-”_

 

 _“Do you think we have that ability to let him know what was happening all these times?”_ He can hear so clearly at those muffled sentences he heard through the door, It was clearly Matsukawa and Hanamaki, as if there was some sort of argument they were in. He was supposed to crash in and be nosey as he could’ve normally did –

 

 _“Oikawa deserves an explanation.”_ That had his heart stopped for a moment.

 

_What..?_

 

 _“Do you think that’s it’s just okay and all rainbows when we tell him, huh?”_ There was a twinge of anger at that tone in Makki’s reply.

 

_“Okay how about I’ll set up something and he’ll remember-”_

 

_“I know Oikawa loves him but-”_

_Wait what?_

_I love who now?_

 

He took steps back as he began processing all he had heard (well he didn’t heard them all entirely but you get the point he stopped right there). Oikawa clutched the small piece of clothe served as wiping the smudges off the table, then blinked. Nonchalantly standing up straight as he took his coat. He then gave his good-byes to Kunimi and Kindaichi and went off, trying to stabilize himself and went on.

 

But he could’ve stayed in his wake;

 

_“–Iwaizumi’s done for.”_

 

* * *

 

“This was a bad Idea...”

 

He should’ve just turned down the order, and gave the work to someone else.

 

But no, but he had to just go there, and bring this goddamn delivery to this house he was told that have been sp creepy yet what he’s still going there –

 

Ugh, Oikawa grumbled to himself. Matsun, I will end you some day.

 

Stopping back ever so slightly at the sidewalk, Tooru’s eyes knitted together as he faced the destination he was supposed to go.

 

He looked down at the piece of paper (which was the address), then back at the gates of the that creepy house.

 

There were creaking sounds of cicadas were filled in through the whole silence, soothing him, sort off.

 

 “Eugh,” He said to himself. “Let’s just get this over with...” Oikawa then finally stepped infront of the gate. There was that family name was plastered at the gate next to the doorbell; “IWAIZUMI HOUSEHOLD”

 

(“Iwaizumi Hajime. Sorry (not sorry lmao) for hitting you...”

 

“Iwa... Iwawa... Izu.. Iwazi...”

 

“Uhm-”

 

“ Iwa...Iwa-chan! You’re going to be my best friend from now on!”

 

“Iwa-cha- what!?”)

 

“Tooru-kun!?”

 

Ahh, there it is again.

 

A woman in her thirties (yet he assumed first she wasn’t _that_ old), her eyes almost brimmering with tears, her mouth formed to an ‘o’ stood infront of her, her gaze astonished at the boy’s sudden appearance. “Oh goodness, Uhm, Oikawa-san!” She said. Before he could even react why she had known his name, she then added off. “I-I’m an old friend of yours! Aiko-san! We’ve met at the hospital, yeah?”

 

“Oh,” That was all he could say, Maybe we did met back there, he mused, drawing out his fake smile as he usually would play out to the customers. “Here’s a delivery from the café!”

 

Blinking at the small package of cupcakes infront of her, she started to speak. “I didn’t-” But by a glance, Aiko’s eyes widened at the letter stuck infront of the box, letting her stare at it for a moment then looked back at Oikawa once she’d taken the box in her hands. “Uhm, How about you’d come in for a moment? Surely that was a long delivery, no?”

 

“Oh! It’s not necessary-”

 

“Oh c’mon! I insist Tooru-kun!” She had his arm in her grasp, pulling him more willingly than he could even respond to her offer. “You’re all welcome here!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was oddly neat than he had much expected in a woman’s home.

 

There were small, some great picture frames had been hung on the wall, it might’ve been her family with her,, he suspected as he had seen how close she held the man next to her, which was probably her husband, and their son looking all gruff and yet so adorable in his forced smile.

 

“Tooru-kun, would you like some herbal tea?” He heard Aiko-san from the kitchen.

 

YES OHMYGOD “Oh! That would be a fine!” He called out and she replied with a contented ‘Okay!’

 

He wandered even more in the household, diving through the whilst of memories the family had made in the whole household.

 

One room in particular, made him stop in his tracks.

 

A sign was hanged up at the door’s post, “Iwaizumi” was written, but in some sort the ‘izumi’ was crossed out with an oddly shade of a blue crayon, then some childish writing below made it much more clearer; “Iwa-chan and Tooru-sama”

 

He stiffened as he stared at the sign.

 

There were squeaky voices ringing in his ears, his stomach felt like it was churning. Laughter then came soon after; it was so familiar for once.

 

\---

( _“Hey Dummy, Wait what are you doing okay WHAT ARE YOU DOING STOP”_

_Little Eight year-old Oikawa squealed once he had soon after finished hanging up the ‘new’ sign to its post. “I rinovated (“It’s renovated- dummy” “Mean Iwa-chan! I’m trying to look smart here!”) Your room’s sign, Iwa-chan!” He beamed showing of the result of his work as he gestured young Iwaizumi to the door’s sign._

_“Tooru-sama... What...”_

_“Since we’re like roomies now,” Tooru said and stood up like a pompous king, making Iwa-chan flushed in his place. “I decided to make it our room! Haha- OW IWA-CHAN YOU MEANIE WHAT ARE YOU-”_

_“DUMMY LOOK YOU RUINED MY CRAYONS” Iwa-chan yelled as he pinched Oikawa’s sides, causing the other to screech in his grasp._

_He didn’t really mind, really. If he had hated that sign he never should’ve let that stay._ )

\---

His breathed was shaken off at the sight of the room. (Boom its happening bru h)

 

There were awfully old posters of aliens (to his amusement) and astronauts around the walls, drawings taped on some spaces, definitely making him laugh at his own old signature of his when he was a child.

 

Tooru then stopped by a picture, blinking at the two children showing through (duN DUN DuN).

 

There he was, in his young self, his right arm wrapped around another person as he brought up his signature peace sign and that real smile of his. The person next to him was oddly pouting as he looked to the side, not really taking the mind to atleast look at the picture taking as he held up Tooru’s ‘Best Setter’ Award.

\---

( _“Iwa-chan! Iwa-chan c’mon look!”_

_“Dumbass, I’m not taking another damn picture-”_

_“Hajime-chan!” Iwazumi’s mother had called out on them , causing the brunette to instantly close the gap between him and Iwaizumi as he posed off for the picture._

_But in what way, he felt a hint of Iwa-chan’s little own smile back there._ )

\---

His eyes wandered over to the bed, it hadn’t been set up before.

 

Bringing up the sheets then making up the bed, Tooru felt another pound from his chest making its way to let it be heard.

\---

_(“Iwa..”_

_Pants and grunts had made its way through the room._

_Oikawa’s grip tightened as he felt that sensation building up through his stomach, his back arching once he felt that pleasure again –_

_“Iwa- Ah- Iwa-cha—” His voice was strained, yet he bucked his hips to Iwaizumi’s hand. He felt those fluttering butterfly kisses from the outline of his jaw, to the back of his ear, down, down, down tracing sloppy kisses to his collar bone, then making it back to his jaw once more. A peck was then placed on his cheek._

_“I love you...”)_

\---

“Tooru-kun..?”

 

Nonchalantly arriving at the kitchen, Oikawa blinked at Aiko’s confused call. The man shook his head and smiled back at the woman, reassuring her that he was okay.

 

Memories, they say, at some point would come back to the patient’s psychological mind, reverting back the person’s whole condition back to normal.

 

That’s what would the doctor would have said.

\---

_(“You know you packed up too much water for the traini- Asskawa what the he—”_

_A loud screech was heard throughout the room, causing Hajime’s parents to arrive to the kitchen from the unusual screech._

_They didn’t know whether they should be worried or just plain amused._

_“I-Iwa-chaaaaaan” Oikawa whined as he had held up the pot’s cover, his eyes glossy with tears as numerous ingredients had scattered through the whole kitchen. “I’m so sorry! I wanted to surprise you-” He stopped for a moment to look at Hajime’s face, which was no scrunching up to suppress his laughter. “Eh- What the hell!? It’s not funny Iwa-cha-”_

_“Oh my god-” Iwaizumi snorted, crouching down to hold his laughter, ended up howling it. “W-what the actual fuck where you even- oh my god-”_

_“IWA CHAN HOW COULD YoUU”)_

\---

 

* * *

 

 

A soft sigh was let out from Kageyama’s breath, the raven haired boy pinched the bridge of his nose and went on staring at the living room’s coffee table, silence was only heard.

 

“I shouldn’t have told you before, but..” Tooru’s eyes lit up as he started. “You and Iwaizumi-san were a couple before. I was really surprised that you didn’t even remember anything at all from him until now...”

 

Known to only have a temporary amnesia it would’ve had no problem at all to let it all come back; why has it only come back _now_?

 

“Where is he?” With a sputter Oikawa managed to let it out that question, leading back to Tobio who had now shook in fear from his question. “Tobio-chan,” He added, “Please, where is he-”

 

_“In the hospital.”_

 

His eyes widened at the response. “Wh..” He stammered. “What..?”

 

“I promised him not to tell you but,” Tobio ad answered back his question, his face was conjured in a concerned one. “H-he has cancer.” He’d let it out finally. The lad looked up at Oikawa, meeting his guilty gaze to his’. “He was diagnosed after your accident that he had to stay in there.”

 

 

* * *

 

 “He’s at room one hundred four-” Kageyama panted, running alone next to Oikawa who was dashing out at the hospital’s entrance. “Just take the eleva-”

 

“Tooru?”

 

Oikawa stiffened. With one whirl he faced at the source of the voice.

 

A man in his thirties stood up from one of the lounge’s chair. “Y-you...” The man stuttered out, bringing up his hand as he pointed out to Oikawa’s direction. Looking at him in disbelief; as if he had seen a ghost for the first time in his life. “Tooru-kun how did you...”

 

“Iwaizumi-sama-”

 

Both pair of eyes shifted of to Kageyama, who nonetheless sweating like he had ran a marathon, shocked at the whole presence infront of him.

 

‘ _Iwaizumi-sama..? What-_ ’ Oikawa’s head was filled with numerous questions, urging him to hold is head as flashes of images abruptly displayed in his mind.

 

“Oikawa-san..!”

 

“Tooru-kun..!”

 

\---

( _“Tooru-kun! Are you for real!?”_

_“Well, ahaaaa”_

_Not that too long ago, Oikawa was seated infront of Iwaizumi’s parents, Iwaizumi Hasuo and Aiko, who were now clinging into each other’s arms as they stared at the shining ring on its case in astonishment. “Tooru-kun, oh my god-“ Aiko excitedly choked out (keeping herself from screaming and jump out on Oikawa), holding up the black clothed case as she cradled the exquisite (and expensive lol) piece of jewelry in her soft, shaking hands. “Are you really planning to propose to him!?”_

_“Well, I’m all tired from waiting Iwa-chan to make a move...” Tooru giggled as the woman almost screeched, only to have her husband to prevent his wife to embrace the poor lad. “So, I’m asking you as a permission to let me-”_

_“YeSYESyESYESyesyESYESAHH”_

_Laughter filled the whole room. Nothing other than having Oikawa and his soon to be in-laws together was already precious for him to make._

_“I’m really happy for you Oikawa, I’ll root for you,” Hasuo sucked his breath from laughing so hard, he continued, “But, are you sure you’re still okay with him? And his condition...”_

_Oikawa blinked as he stared at the man infront of him. “Ahh,” He muttered, scratching the back of his neck as he continued on for his explanation. “I do love him, I-I really do. And I’m always there to stay with Iwa-chan... Well yeah, he kept a secret and lied to me for being better, but I wanna share all of the things with him, - Ah, Aiko-san, oh goodness please don’t cry-” He chuckled slightly at the woman’s reply on how sappy he was saying, and then the man continued on, “I wanna be with Iwa-chan, no matter how it takes...”_

_“I’ll stay with him...”)_

\---

 

“The doctor says he has been better for now,” Iwaizumi Hasuo muttered. The man brought up his cup of tea and, strangely, stared into the small container of liquid, before even taking a drink of his own. “Since he knows, he’s... Tormented on dying.”

 

Kageyama’s eyes widened at the sudden statement, his facial expression suddenly changed in a mixture of confusion and concern. “Wait I thought he’s okay now-”

 

Oikawa had his head hanging down with no response, all of these, unsure, feeling ran around in his mind and it began to ache inside.

 

It hurt.

 

“Let me ask you something, Tooru,” Hasuo leaned over, his eyes was filled with sadness and frustration within, making the other shiver at his gaze. “If you see him now, what can you do for him?”

 

That had Oikawa leading on a surprised state.

 

“I’ll...” He’d often started off a pompous reply in most of his own life in these types of questions, practically any kind of question he had received in his whole life, until at this point he was confused. It had lead Oikawa not that all concerned. He began to hold his chest as he stayed quiet. What would he do for Iwaizumi? What? It rang to him. It was seemingly like they were broken bells ringing off at someone’s wrong moment. “I’ll stay with him.” Tooru then said; his grip on his own pants much tighter than he could’ve even imagined having. Yet—

 

“How much of Hajime, have you even remembered having with him?”

 

Silence was mutually was his own enemy for the time being.

 

“Oikawa, “Hajime’s father stated, his voice was strained, even. “That was, what you said to him four years ago, before the accident.”

 

Oikawa remembered those screeching of metal oh so suddenly. He felt like screaming, he didn’t even know. He could even remember that aching pain that he had received at that impact from the car, being hit so slowly yet so painfully. It was almost something he had feared ever since from riding a vehicle.

 

“You didn’t stayed with him after that accident you had, he felt like you ran away from him.” Oikawa glanced over at Tobio. He was much guiltier at this unusual change of events. Rather than he expected a light visit he had learned it was too late. “You lost your memories of him, and he decided to leave things be as he had talked about this with your family.”

 

“He was facing death and he isn’t pressuring you, Tooru-kun.”

“He didn’t want to be selfish and keep you worrying, so he never said a word.”

 

Oikawa then looked up straight to Hajime’s dad in disbelief.

 

“Please, forget about Hajime, and find someone else to be with.”

 

The latter had then looked down on his lap; he felt those streaks of tears dripping down on his chin.

 

 

“There’s no way...” He had said, then looking up to give him a weak smile. “I could do that, it’s Iwa-chan.”

 

( _“What are you doing?”_

_Oikawa stiffened at Iwaizumi’s sudden change of voice. He held his head down; as he shook from bringing some of his clothes in his luggage. “I-I’m going to your parent’s house..”_

_“Why?”_

_The brunette squeezed his eyes shut, his vice grip on his sweater making it torn. “I’ll- We’ll be talking about... Taking you to the hospital, Iwa-chan...”_

_Iwa-chan held on his bag. His stare continued on, making Oikawa fumble on his seat once the other continued on his packing. “You...” He started, stepping forward near the brunette. “Why haven’t I heard a thing, Oikawa?”_

_He could see Oikawa shook even more, hesitant at what his answer what might be._

_One of these things he didn’t understand most of it was why, of all things why did he had to leave me? That question remained in his head, making his heart ache much more rather than he wanted it to be calm for the time being. Is it because I’m not healthy? Because I’m sick—_

_Was it because I’m not good enough for you?_

_“B-because I couldn’t tell you..?” That was the stuttering, Iwaizumi’s eyes wandered over Oikawa’s face, it was stricken with hurt and worry, utmost all guilt started to wash over him at each moment he was looking down any longer._

_It wasn’t common for people to leave their partners that easily for that one mere illness, Iwaizumi bitterly laughed in his mind at that point. He had in his mind that there, Oikawa had known albeit he wanted to keep it away from him. There wasn’t supposed to be any hurtful problems, never had himself wishing over, having the essential want to hold him, keep him away from these assumptions, everything –_

_Another step was taken, “Why are you making assumptions?” His tone was slightly changed into a much harder, angered one, receiving a small whimper form Tooru who had his luggage almost finished. “Oikawa, answer me.”_

_“I-I was afraid that you won’t have to...”_

_Iwaizumi’s eyes narrowed at the sight of him being immersed in his thoughts, being so deep in those sworn unruly whispers of any much more possible dictations this would lead to._

_“An-And I thought for our future, your future Iwa-chan-”_

_What kind of future would I have without you? Iwaizumi screamed in his head, his hands were now formed into fists, blood almost drawing out from his nails digging in his flesh._

_“D-didn’t you wanted to be a novelist writer, Iwa-chan...?”_

_It felt like a dam, breaking suddenly for that change, all those feelings began pouring down, exploring, immediately taking all those hesitant things that had him keeping him from breaking._

_“Will telling you that I’m not better will make you happy, is that it!?” He had then started to yell, causing Oikawa to jump at his assumption. “Didn’t you want to be a professional artist with me? Is that it? You want to leave me!?”_

_He wanted to tell him he loved him. Loved him no matter what would happen, hold onto him if he had to; cling on his arms for warmth as he begged him to go back. As if everything that was happening was too wrong and he wanted to be back where everything was alright._

_“I’m going with you.” Was all he said then dashed out to take his boyfriend’s bag. He then looked back to Oikawa, who was frozen in his place._

_“I don’t give a damn on my future or anyone’s future, Shittykawa Hell with it!”)_

* * *

 

_(“A sketchbook was neatly placed ontop of their coffee table. Messy, some broken and prickled hand picked out old drawing materials were sprawled beside the sketchbook. A simple, sentence was quoted near to a messy drawing of a couple...”_

_“Stars glimmering in the night, everything was bright—_

_Tell me once more, that you’ll love me forevermore.”)_

_(“Eh, Iwa-chan! Why’d you have to write that sappy stuff on my innocent artwork..!”_

_“It suits the whole damn thing, you dumbass,” Iwaizumi quietly said, then adding one more quoted sentence below;_

_“Let’s meet again when I get better, okay?”)_

* * *

 

( _“You seem to be fine,” The doctor says, a smile written on her face as she finishes up checking the X-ray scans of the brunette’s head.”It seems like after asking you on some questions, I can conclude some of these memories of what you have experienced might’ve been wiped out of your memory. There was a concussion after getting by that car; there have must’ve been something to have made you do something so rash.” The woman then tilts Oikawa’s head as she examines the other’s features. “There might have been some familiar faces you might remember, but you need to rest at least a whole month for you to catch up.”_

_His fingers placed ontop of his bandage, his fingers brushed at the injury, causing him to wince at that slight memory of him crashing up from another car. “Thank you,” He muttered, standing up to leave the room.)_

* * *

 

Light had flashed inside the room as the switch was turned on, transferring the darkness elsewhere.

 

Iwaizumi had groaned and squeezed his eyes shut at the light burning his eyes as he first opened them, adjusting who had opened them. “Who did tha-” His voice was almost weak, Oikawa would muse as the other sat up as he rubbed his eyes, only to meet his once he had opened them.

 

Questions in his mind were tossed almost everything to him, Oikawa stood there, in all his glory, holding up an old shoulder bag as he wore his old Aoba Johsai Jacket. He opened his mouth to first demand what the actual fuck was happening here, wanting to know utmost everything that had happened while he was resting, yet again, Iwaizumi had closed his lips, sealing them shut as Oikawa started to speak;

 

“I... I used your motorcycle to arrive here.”

 

“Wh...” His voice was now hurt so suddenly, Iwaizumi’s eyes began to hold up his tears. “What were you doing?” He sputtered out, his grip on the hospital sheets tightening every moment that was passing by. “You would’ve woken up with that damn thing...”

 

“I just, Iwa-chan-”

 

It had been so long.

* * *

 

“You know, Iwa-chan,”

 

“Mm?” Iwaizumi lay out himself on Oikawa’s lap, his head surfaced with a soft pillow. “What is it?” He asked, shifting to the other side to face the brunette.

 

“When I had my accident, I was actually supposed to give you this,” Oikawa fumbled through his pants as he slipped in his hand inside his pocket, pulling out a silver ring from it. He held up Hajime’s hand to his. Much to his protest (which was kind off a lie since he also wanted to marry him nyehhehe), He slipped it on Iwaizumi’s ring finger, shining through the moonlight.

 

“D.. Dumbass,” Iwaizumi’s eyes were softened as he held up his hand high, astonished at the ring’s appearance. “You could’ve been waiting me to buy one for you...”

 

“Eugh, you were so slow, Iwa-chan-” Oikawa manage to slip out a tease and laughed at Iwa-chan’s glare, smiling brightly as he stared up high at the moonlit sky. “I heard,” They hold hands, fingers entangled. “Every illness is curable when you have your significant other with you.”

 

Hajime snorted. “That’s not very realistic at all, Idiotkawa.” He said, staring off at their hands, smiling softly at the peace they had finally received.

 

“Well, It may not be realistic,” Tooru brought up their hands, giving a peck on the back of Iwaizumi’s palm.

 

_“But I think there would’ve been a lot of things we have done if we did...”_

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

 

 

“Oh, you’re still here?” Randy had him blinking at him in bewilderment, curious and _where the hell did you just came from_ had him confused on the young man’s current situation was.

 

“Ah-ah, Y-yes,” Oikawa muttered out his response in his rusty English, causing the American’s face to cease in amusement. America, he had lived utmost three months at his state for once. He had himself done with the always same environment he was in at Miyagi back at Japan. Sure, it gave him a lot of precious memories. But at the back of his mind he wandered of trying to live off somewhere new to start off.

 

“Well, I’m better off Tooru, See you next week!” The blonde gestured him a farewell once he had himself dashing off his own van, driving back home.

 

\---

_( **“Oikawa..?”**_

****

**_“Hmm?”_ ** _Oikawa leaned down facing Iwaizumi on his lap. He had realized most of the things right now as he held his Iwaizumi, **Iwa-chan** on his arms._

_Iwaizumi Hajime wasn’t some memory. Not that he had seen on those old crumpled pictures he had once had that were taken away due to his temporary amnesia, not that much of all those verbal insults he was thrown at in his own amusement or none of that some sort._

_It felt like a dream. A wonderful, **wonderful** dream. _

_If he could take an opportunity to even hold him much more despite this little, short time he has, take all those worries that had trapped him and Hajime all alone in this world. He could feel that thick borderline between them. He knew, oh he knew by that time there wasn’t anything he could do but wish._

_He had begged and cried over this situation in his whilst most of the time after these years he had left Hajime waiting as he had what, fumbling on his own life not realizing that gaping hole was right there infront of him._

_Oikawa wasn’t even sure at that innocent glance he has been seeing even as a child, it was so fast rather than he could imagine. Fast, yes, but not that fast, just right and slow yet he was quick on remembering such things he had on to cherish._

_It had him driven to almost insanity._

**_“’Till death do us part, i-it’s good enough for me,”_ ** _Hajime mumbled, despite himself being out of breath from taking this long to tell him this. Oikawa felt burning within even at this cool place they were in, lying under the moonlight. The tanned other drew his calloused fingers up to the Tooru’s, his glance was sweet yet it was so heavy with sadness. **“That’s enough for me so stay by my side till then...”**_

_He swore there was explosion flaming in his own body._

**_“You don’t deserve me, Tooru, please,”_ ** _Stop, stop, he pleaded so hard he felt like screaming in his mind. “Please do me one this favor,” He squeezed his eyes and shook. **“I don’t want you to cry for me, I want you to be happy... Would you do that for me?”**_

_Silence had been echoing around the whole environment as if there was no one else but this whole sentence that had been ringing in his head._

_I don’t want you to cry for me._

_Tooru drew in a shaky breath, maintaining his order. He didn’t want to cry infront of Hajime like this. Not now, not at this situation. He wanted to feel free within his arms, feeling nothing but happy and nothing but this uneasiness around him, wanting to consume him so much he won’t let go. **“O..”** He started, his hesitance was strong, he had been struggling so much to say yes and say no so much he wouldn’t allow it for more than a thousand years._

_But this was Hajime._

**_“O...kay.”_ ** _He had said it so finally, casting over his eyes to Iwaizumi’s which were pooling with tears._

**_“This makes me happy,”_ ** _Iwaizumi choked out, sitting up to meet Oikawa’s orbs, which were now watery as much as his were. He gave out his smile, that true smile. So vulnerable and full with love, Oikawa felt his own tears pooling down through his red cheeks._

**_“Hey Iwa-chan, do you remember what I told you before? That appears in the night sky?”_ ** _Oikawa had began, wiping his tears away so furiously._

****

**_“Ah, you mean the lunar rainbow?”_ **

**_“You know Iwa-chan,”_ ** _He leaned over to Hajime, hiding away his new set of tears on the other’s stray locks. He pressed his face to Hajime’s hair to cry. **“I..”**_

**_“I-I wanna see it.. Together, with you, Iwa-chan.”_ **

****

**_“Eh, You dumbass, why are you crying?”_ ** _Iwaizumi pulled back to wipe off the taller one’s tears, laughing so feeble to cheer him up at this utmost moment. His laughter went stronger at Oikawa’s whine to don’t-touch-me-but-okay-touch-me-I-need-it and Iwaizumi’s eyes felt watery once again._

**_“I’m not cryinnnnnnng”_ **

****

**_“Don’t cry for me, ever, you shitty Oikawa.”_ ** _)_

\---

 

Oikawa had let out a loose, shaky sigh as he had been mesmerized with the lunar rainbow infront of him.

 

It was quiet.

 

The waved left him a glance of his own reflection as he looked down to study his own features. His hair, once so much more styled in a nice manner, now mussed and he wasn’t even bothered to hold it up anymore, his eyes were looking so tired and his body might’ve left him.

 

He was _indeed_ tired.

 

It wasn’t a blatant lie after all, Oikawa knew.

 

Simple, no, long, five months and on-going he had held up _this._

 

_‘I love him, I love him so much...’ Tooru brought up his arm to wipe his upcoming tears streaking down to his face. He sniffed, his own frame shaking._

_(Don’t cry for me, ever.)_

 

_“Can I cry... Just this once?”_

* * *

 

 

 

_“Daddy! Daddy!”_

_“Ah, what it is now?” A young man, around in his early twenties brought down to his knee as his young children squealed in delight his arms as he squeezed them tight in his arms._

_“Can you tell us a story again? The one with the samurai!”_

_“Yoshimi, we already heard that already!” The boy next to girl supposed to be named Yoshimi had been pinched by him, making the young brunette screech in his wrath._

_“Mean Fuji-chan! Mean!” Yoshimi clung over her father’s arm. “Daddddyyyyyy” She urged him, making the suited man laugh in response._

_“You know Takeru, It would’ve been easier when you should’ve taken them to bed earlier,” A young lady, must’ve been the young man’s wife had sang along from the hallway as she walked by to the children’s bedroom, “Yoshimi was having her milk bread cravings again!” at that statement it had been making the husband laugh much more in his wake._

_“Well, how about it kids, I’ll tell you the story if you get ready.” In his amusement his own children scrambled on their feet, eager on their adventure they were about to have as._

_The man sat on to the mattress, chuckling at the soft padding of his children’s footsteps. Soothing over the over-excited children, he started off a mysterious entrance.”Let me tell you a story...”_

 

**_“Of a samurai, who was on a journey to find the majestic lunar rainbow. Who had found love...”_ **

**Author's Note:**

> I may or may not used the movie’s main character names in the story as children pls heLp mE
> 
> Fml I have made use of Takeru welp wooptiedoo it’s a bit of a happy-ish ending ryt??? //Lays down and sobs disgustingly
> 
> Gusto ko ikalma puso ko ayoko na ahHAHhah Okay lets just forget what i wrote mwehehe
> 
> Please do leave comments of your opinions of the story and Kudos are much appreciated loves! 
> 
> You can cry with me ON Twitter @ProllyIwaChan


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